Lisa and Jess
Hi! We are Lisa and Jess. Thank you for the taking the time to learn about us!
We are both excited about open adoption. We firmly believe that having more people in a child’s life who love them and want the best for them is only a good thing. As gay women, we know the importance of chosen family; we view the birth parents and extended birth family as part of our chosen family and can’t wait to have more loving people in our life.
We met in San Francisco in 2013 when Lisa’s friends created a Match.com profile for her, found Jess, and winked at her on Lisa’s behalf. Lisa was working long hours as a lawyer and said she had no time to date. Jess’s dating rule was to meet for a quick coffee/drink so she had an exit strategy. With Lisa, she knew something was different and suggested that they meet for a hidden city stairway walk. Lisa didn’t heed her friends’ warning that Jess might be an axe murderer luring Lisa to her death, and agreed to meet up. We hit it off immediately and talked for hours. Luckily, Lisa discovered that she wasn’t in fact too busy to date!
From our first date, we talked about how important family is to us, how we are both very engaged aunts, and how both of us hoped to have a family. We also learned that we both deeply care about our friends, giving back to our community, being active outdoors, and engaging in friendly competition. We have made many bets, which Jess thinks she wins 51% of the time.
Lisa was initially struck by how easy it was to be with Jess and talk with her about anything and everything. Lisa is not generally eager to share personal details of her life, but she opened up immediately to Jess. Over time, Lisa has continued to warm up to Jess’s love of camping. In her wedding vows, Lisa even promised to consider backpacking with Jess, which she has considered, so she thinks she’s satisfied her vow. #Lawyered.
Jess was immediately drawn to Lisa’s authentic drive to give back to family, friends, and community, as well as her thoughtfulness. Early on, Jess’s friends shared that they were exhausted with an infant at home and no money for a sitter. Lisa immediately offered to babysit to give them a date night, even though she had only recently met them. Jess has learned that this kind of thoughtfulness is core to who Lisa is.
Several years ago, we began to think about where we’d want to build our life. In 2018 we chose to move to Portland from San Francisco because we already had friends and family here, it is a quick flight to loved ones in California, is LGBT-friendly, has great culture, is a great place to raise kids, and provides easy access to nature. We are both lucky to have jobs that we like (Lisa is very happily no longer practicing law!), are flexible, and allow us a lot of time to pursue other fun activities, volunteering, and building community in our new home.
We have talked about, imagined, and planned for our family from day one. Our hope for our child is that they have joy, curiosity, and feel deeply and unconditionally loved. Lisa can’t wait to teach our child to play a variety of sports and Jess can’t wait to take them camping. We look forward to dinners around the table, attending many family events in our neighborhood, exposing our child to our traditions with friends and extended family, and continuing to create new traditions. We hope to be able to continue to travel as often as possible with our child to explore the world together.
Thank you for reading this; we can’t wait to meet you!
-Lisa and Jess