Melissa and Simon
Hello, we are Simon and Melissa. We’ll start by introducing each other…
Melissa through Simon’s eyes: Melissa is engaging, unusually loving, intelligent, and frequently quite silly. She is known in our community as a “baby whisperer” because she loves babies, and has a real skill at calming them when they are upset. She loves to research and study topics that interest her, and will apply this to raising a child just as she has to her work, to dog training, health and gardening. She just started dancing again (an activity she did throughout her childhood) and is loving it!
Simon through Melissa’s eyes: Simon is very friendly, and a natural teacher and storyteller. He is a generous and encouraging husband, as he will no doubt be as a father. He is an unusual man in his ability to be emotionally open and talk things through, which has contributed to his success as a social worker and a therapist. Simon is an avid tennis player, reader of fiction and has been playing the guitar since he was 15 – we can sometimes be found singing duets to his guitar.
We met in 1999 when we were both social workers at an agency that worked with disadvantaged children. Our shared interest in social work and children felt like a rare connection and five years later, we married (on a Blue Moon!) in our friends’ spacious backyard amidst our friends and family.
Since we met, we’ve been enjoying fun and adventure in travel (our best experience was climbing a volcano!) and being outdoors (we like camping on the beach away from modern conveniences, or just taking a walk to local parks). We love to laugh until we cry and we’re cuddly people – Simon is often found on the floor cuddling our dog, Trudy. She is 3 years old with tons of personality – she has the best “protest howl” you’ve ever heard. We talk a lot about pretty much anything. We savor our time together at home. Since neither of us particularly likes cooking, cleaning or grocery shopping, we share in these duties equally.
We have been preparing for parenthood for a while, even in the area of our careers. We both chose to go into private practice as psychotherapists in part because it means we’ll have little need for childcare when we become parents. Melissa’s parents will fill in where needed – they’re so excited to be first-time grandparents! We are fortunate to know many families built through adoption and look forward to joining their dinners celebrating adoption and shared experiences.
There is no question in our minds that we want an open adoption. Melissa’s mother chose adoption for her firstborn in 1964 when adoptions were closed. We want the birth mother (and family) of our child to see for herself that her child is well-loved and cared for – something Melissa’s mother did not have. We chose OA&FS specifically because of the support they are committed to providing for birth mothers and to supporting and nurturing relationships between all involved in an open adoption.
When we think of open adoption and our future child, we love that she will know where she got her smile or her artistic tendencies. We love that from the beginning he will have the opportunity to know his birth family as more than just pictures. It’s heartwarming to think of how loved she will no doubt feel.
Thank you for taking the time to read our letter. We wish you peace in the choice that you make.
Sincerely,
Melissa, Simon, and Trudy too!