Benny and Wright
Dear Expectant Parent(s),
The story of how we met depends on who tells it...
Benny: “I remember meeting Wright and knowing instantly that he was ‘the one!’ My entire world changed in that moment. I remember feeling the same way about Dr. Pepper.”
Wright: “The first day I met Benny he was wearing a Texas A&M t-shirt that was a little on the small side. It told me two things about him. First, he was a Texas boy like me, and second, he was a big kid at heart!”
No matter whose description is more accurate, two years later that first date led to our wedding day before close friends and family. Knowing we always wanted to be parents, we began the open adoption journey and were placed with our son, Tristen, in 2009. We are greeted each morning with the flash of his smile and even in the dark he lights up the room. He is growing up so fast and is constantly on-the-go exploring new things. Whether discovering how a card with music turns on or how a stuffed animal sings, Tristen’s curiosity knows no limits... and we have the shredded cards to prove it!
Being a Papa was a lot harder than Benny had initially imagined. Suddenly, he was thrust into the world of midnight diaper runs to Walgreens and baby vomit as his new cologne. Being the more meticulous of the two of us, it was only fitting that, when necessary to pee during a diaper change, Tristen chose Benny as his target. All in all, being a Papa has shown Benny what really matters in life. Receiving a kiss from Bitty Buddy (as Benny nicknamed him) at the end of a long day wipes away all tension. Building a tunnel out of boxes or a tower out of Legos is now the most fun thing to do! Sharing these moments with his son is the greatest gift he has ever known.
Confidence is one of Wright’s best qualities and it shows through with Tristen. He always appears to be calm, cool and collected, even if that’s not really the case. Wright’s not a “rough and tumble” kind of guy, but is the first person Bitty Buddy goes to when upset. One of our favorite memories came from dinner out at a Japanese restaurant. Out of the blue Tristen leaned over, grabbed Wright’s arm and gave him the biggest hug for no reason. After a quick kiss on the head, Tristen went right back to eating as if nothing special had just happened. It was the first time Wright felt like a great Dad.
We work in the entertainment industry; Benny on the business side, Wright on the artistic, while Tristen just entertains! We lead busy lives, but family always remains our focus. Our large extended family is spread out all over the country--from Oregon to Montana and down to Texas. We love traveling to see them several times a year and are excited to pick them up at the airport to celebrate holidays or special occasions at home.
While we love traveling to see family, we also love to explore new cultures and see the world. Both of us have spent extended time overseas and want our children to have the same opportunity. On a trip to Japan we wrote our wish to become parents on a wooden tablet at one of the country’s most beautiful temples. A few weeks after returning home we got the call about Tristen! In addition to valuing other cultures and family time, we want our kids to grow up with a passion for learning. Our family is filled with teachers who make learning fun. We can’t wait to help them with homework and school projects.
This letter is the launching point to continue creating our family. Both of us are very close with our siblings and it’s something we wish for our children to experience. We’d love for them to be close enough in age to enjoy each other at every stage of their lives. We know there will be challenging times, like the oh-so-famous game of “I’m not touching you,” and we can’t wait!
It’s easy to get bogged down with everything you wish for your kids. But in the end, we really only want one thing: for our kids to have huge hearts. We want them to grow up feeling loved and passing it on to others. Through our relationship with our children’s birthparents we want our kids to value which parts of them are their birthparents, which parts are us, but most importantly, which parts are their own. This is why we chose open adoption. Thank you so much for taking the time to hear our story, we look forward to hearing yours!
Benny, Wright, and Tristen