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2003-2004 Annual Report

Letter from the Executive Director

Dear Friends,

2004 was a turning point for Open Adoption & Family Services and for adoption around the world. With its increased popularity, adoption was thrust into the spotlight and became the focus of more media and legislative attention than ever before. The Hague Treaty will soon regulate adoption worldwide. Open adoption has gained more acceptance and familiarity nationally, and was even the focus of an hour-long 20/20 with Barbara Walters segment on ABC. As more adoption agencies, attorneys and facilitators have staked their claim on open adoption, the term has become an umbrella category defying definition and encompassing a wide range of adoption scenarios.

All of this presents a challenge for Open Adoption & Family Services. As“open adoption” has taken on a variety of new forms, we have lost our firm hold on that title. As we attempt to differentiate ourselves, in what has become a highly competitive market, we are faced with the question: How do we educate potential clients to discern the qualitative differences between our program and others? As our constituents, you know the long-lasting benefits of our childcentered open adoptions, the value of our strong open adoption community, and the importance of our ongoing guidance and support. Now we must ensure that the public knows.

During the past year, we have pursued strategic action plans to reposition ourselves as the leaders of open adoption in the Northwest. Through intensive marketing on our web site, in newspaper classified ads and in the Yellow Pages, we have regained our footing and our program is flourishing.

At the same time, we’ve continued to implement new and innovative programs to reach out more effectively to birthfathers, birth grandparents, the professionals who work with pregnant women, and gay and lesbian adoptive parents.

Through these efforts, we continue to stand apart as the most progressive, cutting-edge adoption agency in Oregon and Washington.

2005 marks our 20th anniversary. Look at how far we’ve come in two short decades. We began as the pioneers of open adoption in the Northwest, and have emerged as the leaders. In 2005 the board and staff will meet to draft our next strategic plan, which will guide and direct us into the future. As always, we will approach potential challenges and opportunities with innovation and a profound commitment to our child-centered open adoptions.

I’d like to extend my heartfelt appreciation to you, our clients and donors, for your ongoing commitment and support. We could not have come this far without you!

Warm Regards,
Shari Levine, Executive Director

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Service Statistics 2003-2004

Total Placements . . . . . . . . 40

Age of Children at Placement:

Newborn . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 33
3 weeks to 3 months . . . . . 4
3 months to 6 months . . . . 1
6 months to 1 year . . . . . . .1
1 year+ . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .1

Sex of Children Placed
Female . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 16
Male . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 24

Race/Ethnicity of Children Placed:
Caucasian . . . . . . . . . . . . 27
Pacific Islander . . . . . . . . . 1
Hispanic . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1
Mixed Race/Ethnicity . . . . .11

Average Visits per Year . . . . 3
(per Open Adoption Agreement)

Average Months Birthparents in Counseling
Prior to Placement . . . . . . . . . . . . 2.5

Average # of Families in
Pool each Month . . . . . . . . 60

Average # of Families in
Mediation each Month . . . . 4

Average Total Wait in Pool . . . . 9
(in Months)

Last-Minute Placements . . . . 8

Home State of Adoptive Parents
Oregon . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 17
Washington . . . . . . . . . . . 20
Other states . . . . . . . . . . . 3
(one CA, two MA)

Placements with Gay or
Lesbian Couples . . . . . . . . . . 8

Birthfathers Who Signed
Consents . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 18

Birthfathers with Open
Adoption Agreements . . . . . . . . 12

Average Age of Birthmothers . . 24.5

Average Age of Birthfathers . . . . 28

Average Age of
Adoptive Parents . . . . . . . . . . . 38.5

Disruptions . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 5

Birthmother Drug Use During Pregnancy:
None . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 30
Mild . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 8
Moderate . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1
Severe . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . 1

Info Calls from Birthparents . . . 256

Info Calls from
Adoptive Parents . . . . . . . . . . . 591

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Year in Review

Major Projects Completed and Upcoming In 2003-2004:

• OA&sFS created the region’s first birthfather brochure featuring the quotes and photos of birthfathers and adoptive parents. The publication is a companion piece to the agency’s widely recognized birthmother brochure. It addresses how and why birthfathers can be involved in open adoption, and has been distributed to about 3,000 outreach contacts in Oregon and Washington.
• The agency held its first Relationship Skills Workshop. About 60 adoptive parents and birthparents attended the interactive, educational program created and facilitated by OA&sFS staff and board members.
• OA&sFS convened a committee to review gay and lesbian client services. Results include a resource list for gay and lesbian adoptive parents and a “facts about gay and lesbian parenting” hand-out. OA&sFS is also working to add more gay and lesbian client photos and stories to its web site and other publications.
• Agency outreach efforts include hundreds of phone calls and training presentations each year. Highlights of recent months include trainings for 24 OHSU nursing students and a special outreach push in the Seattle area.

For 2004-2005:

• Executive Director Shari Levine and Regional Director Margaret Godfrey are writing and illustrating an open adoption children’s book. The book will be published professionally or in-house in the coming year.
• OA&sFS will begin its next board-staff strategic planning session. This collaborative process will determine agency goals, priorities and projects for a two- to three-year period. The last session was held in fiscal year 2001-2002.

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Roy’s Adopted Heart:

A Different Kind of Openness
By Development Director Tara Wilkinson

OA&sFS Board President Roy Abramowitz isn’t adopted. He’s not an adoptive father, a birthfather or even a birth grandfather. Yet Roy’s support for and understanding of open adoption — unequivocal since he first learned about it almost 10 years ago — has grown ever deeper through the years.

That’s partly because the heart beating in Roy’s chest, transplanted there in 1999, is the focus of an “open adoption” of sorts with the organ donor’s parents. “I consider them family,” Roy said, “and they consider me family. We share holidays and birthdays and visits.”

Pioneering a New Openness

In 1998, a heart problem Roy had struggled with for three years was diagnosed as cardiomyopathy, a disease causing steady and irreversible weakening of the heart. He was only 44 years old but needed a transplant - and quickly.

Four and a half months later, on Feb. 20, 1999, a 21- year-old man named Sean was killed at a party, victim of a tragic shooting accident. Sean’s heart was transplanted into Roy’s chest the next day at Oregon Health Sciences University in Portland. Roy was lucky to be healthy and strong enough for the operation. Many people with cardiomyopathy aren’t.

The transplant was a success. Sean’s tragedy meant Roy’s salvation, a fact Roy was keenly aware of.

“I was very mindful all along,” he said, “that someone had to die in order for me to live.”

Roy wanted to thank Sean’s family, to honor them and share his profound gratefulness. About three weeks after his operation, Roy wrote a letter to the family, still anonymous to him per donor protocol. The Pacific Northwest Transplant Bank acted as intermediary.

“My letter was a short note to thank them,” he said. “I was extremely grateful for the second chance at life. I thanked them for their tremendous courage in their hour of tragedy and despair. And I again just thanked them for everything they did.”

It wasn’t common practice at that time for organ recipients and donors’ families to share identifying information or to become friendly, especially within the first year of a transplant.

The transplant bank had a system allowing families to make gradual contact, but it was seldom used and considered risky. The prevailing wisdom was that contact could have detrimental psychological effects and that organ recipients would be unfairly susceptible to financial or other demands of grieving families.

But Sean’s mom, Mindy Padrick, wrote back two months later. She was honest about her tremendous sorrow. She told Roy all about her son, his life and activities and dreams. After a few more letters, within six months of the transplant, Roy met Mindy and Skip Padrick in person at a Salem restaurant.

“In the parking lot before dinner, we hugged and cried,” Roy remembers. “Mindy asked if she could put her ear to my chest so she could listen to Sean’s beating heart.”

Their bond was immediate. Roy promised the Padricks that “they would never regret making the decision” to share Sean’s organs.

“It’s very healing for the family, too” Roy said, “to know that parts of their loved one are still living inside another human being. In Sean’s case, 54 people lived as a result of his organs and tissues.”

Five years later, Roy and the Padricks still talk to one another once a week and get together several times a year. Roy carries photos of Sean in his wallet. The risk of starting a relationship has been rewarded many times over by a rich and meaningful friendship.

As with open adoption, cultural norms regarding donor families and organ recipients have steadily changed since the late ’80s. It is now understood that these families have a deeply felt need to connect with one another. It helps them grieve; it helps them move on and find new joy. Roy sensed this all along - he’s just that kind of person.

Giving Back

Roy was deeply committed to the practice of open adoption long before his disease and transplant. A certified public accountant and financial planner with Portland’s Perkins and Company, P.C., Roy has been one of OA&sFS’ primary financial advisors since joining the board of directors in 1995.

He was elected board president in 2003.

In addition to his financial savvy, Roy brings to the board an ability to see himself in other people’s shoes, to consider opposing points of view, and to make good decisions for the benefit of the organization.

OA&sFS Executive Director Shari Levine describes Roy as having “a rare and genuine sense of empathy and integrity.”

“It’s a profound privilege to work with him,” she said. “The board benefits immensely from his leadership and kindness.”

Roy first got involved with OA&sFS after meeting with Shari’s husband, Cam, about a financial planning matter. The conversation somehow turned to open adoption, and Roy was intrigued.

“I immediately fell in love with the whole concept of open adoption,” he said. “It made eminent good sense. I became very quickly a firm believer and supporter of what open adoption is all about.”

Roy was born and raised in South Africa, but has lived in the United States since 1971 and in Oregon since 1979. He has a long history of giving back to his community and has served on nonprofit boards his whole career.

In addition to his loyal involvement with OA&sFS, he currently sits on six other boards, including the Portland Estate Planning Council, the Portland Baroque Orchestra and, fittingly, the Oregon Donor Program.

“I’m just a board groupie,” he jokes.

Roy feels the big challenge for OA&sFS in the year ahead is to help people understand the difference between its services and other adoption programs.

“There are a lot of groups claiming” to facilitate open adoptions, he said. “But they don’t do the truly open and nonjudgmental work that OA&sFS does. We just need to get the message out there that we’re running a great operation and try to attract more of that activity our way.”

With Roy at the helm, we’re sure to succeed.

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Open Adoption and Family Services Staff and Board of Directors:

2003-2004 Board of Directors:

President Roy Abramowitz

C.P.A., Perkins and Company, P.C.

Vice President Erik Bergman

Adoptive Parent and Editing Manager,
Waggener Edstrom

Secretary Elisa Larson

Adoptee and Attorney at Law,
Davis Wright Tremaine

Jennifer Blakley

Adoptee and Graduate Student

Grayson Crosby,

Doula

Astrid Dabbeni

Adoptee and Family Support Specialist,
Oregon Post Adoption Resource Center

Ann Gregory, Attorney at Law

Andrea Hardy

Birthmother, Student and Executive
Assistant to the Director at Doernbechers
Children’s Hospital

Paul Heimowitz

Adoptive Parent and
Environmental Community Educator,
Oregon State University

Mary McInnis, Adoptive Parent

Katherine Provancher

Birthmother and Student

Mark Spaur

A

doptive Parent and Senior Engineer,
Kennedy Jenks

Staff:

Shari Levine, Executive Director

PORTLAND

Suzie P. Arnold, Program Supervisor
Amy DeGennaro, Counselor/Mediator
Gillian Freney, Counselor/Mediator
Cindy A. Lee, Fiscal Manager
Sari Prevost, Counselor/Mediator
Lori Timmons, Office Manager
Tara Wilkinson, Development Director

EUGENE

Margaret Godfrey, Regional Director
Erika Cooper-Desmond, Office Administrator
Adrienne van der Valk, Counselor/Mediator

MEDFORD

Susan Freeman, Counselor/Mediator

SEATTLE

Ann Espo, Outreach Coordinator

Erika Johansen

, Counselor/Mediator
Katie R. Stallman, Counselor/Mediator

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THANK YOU, Volunteers!

The following people donated their time and talents to OA&sFS during fiscal year 2003-2004. They spoke at seminars and information meetings, hosted gatherings and parties at their homes, wrote for the Open Page newsletter, served on the board of directors, and helped develop vital new programs.

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THANK YOU, Donors!

The folowing individuals, businesses and foundations generously supported OA&sFS during the fiscal year 2003-2004. Thank you also to all donors who gave anonymously.

Gifts $100 - $249

Gifts $250 - $499

Gifts $500 - $999

Gifts $1,000+

Grant Support

Autzen Foundation — $3,000
Collins Foundation — $3,000
Jackson Foundation — $3,000

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Leave a Legacy

Open Adoption & Family Services is a nonprofit organization committed to building healthy families. Your support is key as we provide innovative and progressive services to adopted children, adoptive parents, birthparents and other important people impacted by open adoption.

Gifts through estate planning are a unique and visionary way to support OA&sFS’ long-range goals and development. They can also provide important tax benefits to the donor.

Have you considered including a gift to OA&sFS in your will? This planned giving method is a relatively simple and highly effective way to remember the agency in your estate planning. Several other planned gift arrangements offer increased rewards to the donor. Take this example of a charitable remainder trust:

William and Kathy place property valued at $500,000 in a charitable remainder trust. Along with an initial income tax deduction of $115,900, they receive an annual income of $30,000. Their total projected lifetime income from the trust is $780,000 over an estimated 26 years. At the end of their lives, the remaining trust assets - an estimated $1,314,300 — are elivered to the charity.

And here’s an example of a charitable gift annuity, another effective planned giving device:

Ellen places $100,000 cash in a charitable gift annuity. Her initial income tax deduction is $49,054. The annuity generates interest, which is used to pay Ellen a yearly stipend of $8,000. At the end of her life, the original $100,000 is donated to her charity of choice.

OA&sFS is immensely grateful for support of all kinds. However, we have a special way to recognize lifetime gifts. It’s called the Family Legacy program, and we welcome anyone making a gift through his/her will or other estate-planning method. Your membership will include a thank you gift and special donor updates.

If you have questions about planned giving or would like to discuss your options with an estate-planning expert, OA&sFS can point you in the right direction. Please call Development Director Tara Wilkinson at 1-800-772-1115.

Thank you for your support!

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Your Contribution:

Open Adoption & Family Services is a nonprofit organization with a progressive approach to building healthy families.

You can help us continue this important work by making a contribution today.

Visit our donation page or call Fiscal Manager Cindy Lee at 1-800- 772-1115 to process a gift by phone.

Thank you!

Our Mission:

Mission Statement Open Adoption & Family Services supports birthparents in making decisions about parenthood in an atmosphere of dignity and respect. When the choice is adoption, we facilitate child-centered open adoptions. We assist birthparents and adoptive parents as they create healthy, longterm relationships addressing the ongoing needs of children.