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Hear From Birthparents...

• Your choices when you find out you are pregnant.(MP3 Audio)
• What is open adoption?(MP3 Audio)
• Support for you.(MP3 Audio)
• Making the best decision for you and your baby.(MP3 Audio)
• Birthfathers(MP3 Audio)

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Birthparents who have placed children through Open Adoption & Family Services told us the following about their experiences. Many of these quotes were taken from written post-adoption evaluations:

Birthmothers:

"I feel happy and confident that my baby will be able to experience everything she deserves, and I am still a part of her life."

"Adoption was hard to choose, but it was the best decision I have ever made. My daughter will be loved and cherished by the adoptive family I chose...I know she will be a blessing to every life that she touches. I love her very much and she will be in my heart always."

"There is so much love in our open adoption. It has the child in the center and ripples out. It touches everyone around us."

"I was thinking solely of the best interests of the one person I love more than life itself, my daughter. I understood and realized that I could not take care of her in the way she needs. I didn't let anyone make me feel guilty about doing any of it."

"My counselor was very thorough, sensitive and supportive. She addressed all of my concerns in a caring and non-judgmental way."

"I looked at closed adoption and turned it away within minutes. This was the first open adoption agency I looked at, and I loved the values the agency practiced. I'm very impressed with the entirety of the agency."

"Everyone at OA&sFS has been very sensitive and understanding during this difficult time. I love the adoptive parents I chose more than I ever could have imagined. I'm glad they are together (with my child) and that I am a part of their lives. The openness is invaluable to me."

"Your ad in the phone book really means what it says. The idea of being able to keep in touch with my boys means so much to me."

"This is the most painful experience I've ever felt. But my counselor and the adoptive parents are wonderful, and I know my son will always be loved and well taken care of."

"My counselor was kind and very delicate in her choice of words, seeming to keep my feelings in mind. She talked me through every step of the process, making sure I understood everything."

"My baby deserved a better life than I'm able to give her, and I couldn't realistically see that that would change in the near future. I knew there was a family that was waiting for her, and that she belonged with them."

"Your agency is wonderfully supportive through this painful process, and I'm gratefeul that I had this agency and this option for me and my son's father."

"I am still receiving counseling and think it is wonderful. I am very grateful to have the opportunity to share my experience and feelings with someone who understands what I'm going through."

"I chose this agency because I actually had a choice in who I gave my baby to. The other agency showed me two families to choose from -- nothing written about them, only photos. How can I choose under those circumstances? Your agency showed me a variety of family profiles along with summaries."

"I chose this agency because I can know I never have to say goodbye to my child. I have contact and visits with her."

"My family and I are so satisfied and fully confident that the adoption process was carried out with professionalism, dignity and respect. We never imagined this could ever happen in such a situation we were in -- not having a plan -- but this agency came through like none of us would have imagined. My baby was very fortunate to be placed in such good hands with such a great family."

"Thank you for helping me with the adoption of my son. In time he will know I loved him enough to find such a warm group to help me find the best home situation and new parents for him."

"Throughout this process I had specific requirements as to who I wanted to raise my child. My counselor was very patient with my requests. She never told me to just settle for someone but continued to support my decisions."

"The counselor I received was very professional and in tune with my emotional needs ... She was very thorough in a somewhat complicated situation like ours, from the first phone call to the follow-up letters. She helped me feel calm during a very emotional time."

"The process was very informative and gave me lots of opportunities to help me get through my grief."

Birthfathers:

"The adoptive parents were beyond awesome throughout this entire process. I was very hesitant about meeting them, and somewhat figured that I would be like a third wheel from the beginning. They do great at showing me how important I am to them in general. It is an amazing feeling to receive that from total strangers."

"What I said and what I wanted was honored and respected ... Services were offered equally to both me and the birthmother. We liked the program because it gave us a way to be a part of our son's life. If it hadn't included that option, we wouldn't have chosen adoption. We wanted to see him grow up. We wanted him to know us.

My son knows I love him; he would be hurt if I wasn't there. The adoptive parents would be disappointed if I wasn't a part of his life. They've laid the groundwork by letting him know where he came from. I followed through by being involved. That makes them happy because it makes their son happy.

I always tell people I placed my son in an open adoption so that their first question will be, "What's an open adoption?" Then I can tell them all about it. I've never met someone who thought less of me after they understood what open adoption is."

"I knew of regular adoption, however, I had never heard of open adoption. The birthmother explained to me what it was, and I must admit, at first, I felt somewhat resistant to the idea of allowing someone else raise my child. 'How can the agency guarantee that the adoptive parents will allow us to be a part of our child’s life? How do we pick a family well suited for him? How do we know that the family will be able to provide for our son?' ... My son is in a great place, I can watch him grow and develop with the confidence that he is well loved and provided for. One of the best characteristics about this adoption is that I didn’t lose a family member, I gained many more."

"Wanting a loving family for your child does not equate to a lack of love or integrity. I feel it is just the opposite."

The counselors showed that they cared for both parents' interests first, then business matters later."

"Under the circumstances we were in, the opportunity to place our child in an open adoption in his best interest was worth more than any thanks can say."